The Kiss Of Death by Shanen Ricci

Author:Shanen Ricci [Ricci, Shanen]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Shanen Ricci
Published: 2024-09-10T00:00:00+00:00

“You’re getting moody because you’re starving. Let’s go eat somewhere nice,” I groaned, dissatisfied with the cheap trailer food she had made me buy and the wrinkled, dirty coat I was wearing.

This date didn’t fucking go as planned. A cemetery was like Disneyland for Dalia, and I wished I was buried three feet under at this moment.

“I’m fine,” she grumbled. Clearly not. “You don’t need to spend money to impress me. This is nice.”

She was playing florist among the tombstones like she was on a mission from the afterlife and wouldn’t stop until every grave was filled with flowers. It drew stares from passersby, but who was I to stop this girl’s insanity? And of course, she hid behind me like a scared rabbit. If I even hinted that we should move along, to continue the date, she shoved a bouquet into my hand with one of her charming glares, as if her little existential crisis was my responsibility to solve for the betterment of humanity.

I even tried to rally a guard to my cause, making him believe that Dalia was trying to dig up a corpse, but instead, he gave her a map of the cemetery and told me how lucky I was to have such a kindhearted woman by my side. My patience was running low, and my brain was exhausted by all of this kindness. What do you have to do to take a girl out of a cemetery nowadays?

“On one condition,” Dalia said, and by this point, I was ready to agree to anything. “I’ll buy you a cake, and you have to blow out a candle. It’s your birthday after all.”

“I’m not eight, Dalia.”

She wiped her hands, dirt buried under her nails. “You can’t be the one taking all of my firsts, and you won’t fight me on this.”

“Fine, then, we’ll buy a candle, and I’ll blow it out on your body. We’ll make it fit between your breasts before I eat you and—”

“No, I’m buying you my favorite dessert,” she cheered, striding past me, but at least it got her to stroll out of the cemetery.

But I wasn’t done suffering yet.

After two hours of driving, all I got to do was pollute the earth even more since almost every bakery in town was closed, and the restaurants weren’t faring any better. Grumpy Dalia was even worse than the euphoric one, so I judged that now wasn’t the best time to inform her I didn’t even like sweets.

“This one is open!” she exclaimed, practically bouncing in her seat when she spotted the little French bakery, which looked like it had survived the apocalypse with its weathered facade.

I parked like a jerk right in front. She was already bounding out of my car before I’d even come to a complete stop. I trailed her like her reluctant shadow. Once inside, she stood on tiptoes, rang the bell, and eyed the pastries like she was window-shopping for her next victim. A mustached giant emerged, looking like he’d seen his fair share of chaos for the day.

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